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Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Hunger

To ache, to long. I've been in this constant state of burning desire for the Lord over the past few months. It's been like life wouldn't be worth living at all if I wasn't pursuing something of eternal weight. That deep desire within all of our hearts to pursue deeper things that will truly satisfy our hearts, I've been finding more and more as I give myself to spending time with the Lord in the mornings and seeking Him in the quiet place. I don't want that aching and longing to be satisfied by keeping myself so busy that I don't make time for it. I know that hunger can only be filled by one thing alone, and that is getting to know my heavenly Father and the way he desires to spend time with me.

Hunger for the things of God is something that is placed within each one of us, and depending on what we are filling our time with actually determines the degree that we feel that hunger. To the degree that we don't have a burning desire for a raw, vivid, alive relationship with our heavenly Father, is to the degree that our Spirit has been dulled by the temporary pleasures of this world. What are we filling our time up with? We can sit in front of TV screens, computers, entertainment of any kind and try to get away from that hunger for something that would satisfy, but we actually need to embrace that hunger, and run into relationship with a real God that really desires each one of us individually!

"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled." Matthew 5:6 When we are hungry for righteousness, for holy things, when we partner with that deep cry echoing from within our hearts that is screaming, "Father I desire to be filled with something that would not leave me feeling empty!" When we wake up a few minutes earlier just to spend some time with the Lord, we create a capacity in our hearts that has been stuffed full of everything else we've been trying to fill ourselves with. Us slowing down and actually wanting to spend time filling ourselves with things from the Word of God actually creates in us room for God to fill us with something! When we create that space and ask, our good Father in Heaven says that He WILL fill us.

A quote from Saint Angela when she was in a place of hungering and desiring the deeper things of the Lord. The Lord said to her, "Make yourself a capacity and I will make myself a torrent." What a promise! The Lord was saying, make room in your dull heart, and I will come like a rushing river and fill you! I want to always keep this gift of longing and desire for the deeper things alive and thriving in my heart! I don't want to let my spirit get dulled and tainted by what this world would say fills. I know that this world has nothing to offer me that will cause my heart to grow in love. I want to fill myself up on things that will last eternally! Another quote that is astounding to me!

"O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need of further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still...Amen." A. W. Tozer

This is the desire of my heart right now. I want to want, I long to be filled with longing. I am ashamed of my lack of desire! When we experience the embrace and touch of the Lord, it both satisfies our hearts, but leaves us longing and desiring more of Him. It's a continuous ride of seeking the Lord out, finding and experiencing Him again, but in return leaving us with a deeper longing in our hearts to find whole heartedness in Him and Him alone.

My heart aches, it burns, it's on fire for something that would not leave me feeling empty, but that would fill my heart and cause me to grow in Love for others and myself.

Strength and Honor,
Grace and Peace.

Isaac

Thursday, March 25, 2010

The Lord's Faithfulness on Display!

It has been altogether way to long since my last update! We've moved into a new decade, and I've started a new season of life here at IHOP-KC. I had just finished up 9 months of life on Nightwatch schedule last time I checked in, and much has been happening in life since then.

Looking back at the past 9 months of Nightwatch here at the International House of Prayer, I realize it was the Lord's perfect leadership in my life to prepare me for the next stage of my time here. The Nightwatch schedule I think really put me in route to live a lifestlye of dedication to the place of prayer, and really forming in me a desire to find my identity in the Lord.

There hasn't been any other underlined theme in my life lately other than placing myself daily before the Lord and confessing my identity and success I have in Him as a son. Resting in knowledge of knowing that my Father in heaven is so pleased with me and so proud of me for choosing to love Him in return. My primary calling in this life is to be in communion with Him on a daily basis.

Just this past week at one of our Sunday evening services I was talking to the Lord during worship. The reality of the fact of how much more committed to me He was, verses my commitment to Him. He is Faithful in His commitment to me even when I fail in my commitments to Him. As I was just talking to Him about how thankful I was for this fact, He just whispered back to me, "Isaac, I want to do life with you!" How refreshing it was for me to hear, more than my daily plans of spending time with Him in the morning, or going to the weekend services, or learning about Him in classes. He was actually genuinely interested in every other area of my life. My time throughout the day when I'm going from class to class. When I'm at the grocery store, when I'm at home cleaning the house, He is interested in talking to me in those places and finding a friend that would commune with His heart!

There has been some new developing areas of opportunity opening up for me this summer. I am planning on for sure returning to Phoenix to be a counselor again at the kids camp that I've participated in the last 2 years. Something that has just recently come up in the last couple months is an opportunity to go to Sierra Leone in western Africa for a three week trip in late June. I've really been asking the Lord if this is something I'm supposed to do this summer. I think it would be an incredible opportunity, but there are many logistical things that would need to line up for this to happen. The primary work I would be doing is working with a private non-profit group that is going to help establish an orphanage. I would be going to document and photograph the children as well as the facilities for supporters back here in the states to get a vision for what this group is trying to establish in Sierra Leone. On top of the full time photography work, I would be helping establish a soccer league structure for the community there. I am really excited for this potential trip, and as of right now am planning on going, but again, there will be quite a few things that need to line up in the next month for me to be on a plan to Africa in June!

The Lord has continued to be so faithful as I've been here in Kansas City serving at the International House of Prayer. I've been enrolled in the school here full time since January, as well as being involved full time as an intercessor missionary, I've had quite the busy schedule lately. My time commitments as an intercessor missionary and full time student are about 50 hours a week right now. So, not leaving much time for anything else on a weekly basis, it has taught me ow to be very good at time management and staying on top of things! I'm praying that the Lord would provide a car in the next couple months so that I can be working somewhere to create an income. I am in need of some supernatural finances on a monthly basis right now, and the Lord has been meeting this needs without exception monthly!

This next week will be 1 year that I have been in Kansas City, I can hardly believe how fast time has flown by! I am so blessed to be at a place like the International House of Prayer! Over any other school or scholarship I could have chosen, I am ultimately glad that I came here with no remorse over the decision! I know that the leading of the Holy Spirit has brought me to exactly the place I am supposed to be!

I am making a priority to be more adamant about keeping this updated with what I'm up to. I head to Boston next week to minister on different college campuses in the Ivy league schools. I'll make sure to let you know how that time goes.

Strength and Honor,
Grace and Peace.

Isaac